


Unholy Confessions - M. Shadows

by xSandra



Category: Avenged Sevenfold
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-01
Updated: 2013-10-01
Packaged: 2017-12-28 03:23:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,309
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/987083
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xSandra/pseuds/xSandra
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Matt Shadows, the feared murderer who has been killing all prostitutes on the street, is now to be found as he leaves his necklace at a crime scene. A young woman, who has been forced into prostitution by her brother brings back Matt's necklace and they eventually fall in love with each other. But what if Gylfie's brother finds out about this relationship?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Unholy Confessions - M. Shadows

"I wish you would kill me out of love, what perfect happiness would that be?"  
Her crystal blue eyes looked up and a spark of light was shown, not afraid to die. As if she was certain to get killed by me.  
She'd killed me several times with her eyes, they were destructible to me.

~~~

"Come back! Listen to me," I yelled at her. I had to keep the tears under control, "Gyl! Gylfie! Wake up!" She didn't move a muscle, now the tears rolled down my cheeks. I shot up when I heard someone knocking – wait, it was louder, whamming – the door. Fear filled my eyes as I gazed at the shadows slowly moving in. As I expected them to scream at the scene, I was surprised when I heard them mumbling.  
"W-what?" one of them called out, "what did you do?" The two men moved closer and I looked up at their eyes, seeing the drama, which was obvious. My arms were wrapped around Gylfie and my bloody arms were starting to smell like the iron-like substance.  
I turned my head back at the limp body and glanced from the corner of my eye at the two men, all confused.  
"The girl is dead! Did you kill her?!" one of them spat, "huh?"  
"Quiet," I mouthed and I stroke my hand through her brown hair.  
"Gyl! You cannot be dead! Can you hear me? Gylfie, don't be so stupid, wake up!" I cried, "baby, I love you."  
I started to panic, looked around, seeing all the blood, I didn't want to know what happened, didn't want to remember...

~~~ 

"The mass murderer from Huntington Beach is caught. It's about the 29-year old singer of the metal band 'Avenged Sevenfold', Matt Sanders.

In my crazy world you were ugly and beautiful like any other man only you were just beautiful.

"His last victim was the 17-year old Gylfie Groover, who was just as the other 5 victims a prostitute." 

Everyone is talking about it, the news, the newspapers, the city, the country, the world...?

~~~ 

It was probably around my 7th birthday when I noticed my dad walking away all the time, he was away for entire nights and sometimes even days, without showing himself around much. It scared me. I had no idea about the things that could happen in the world, things that could happen in relationships. My mum was dying, she was diagnosed with lung-cancer and I knew she was going to die.

It were the last moments I spend with my mother that I cherished the most. I didn't have a lot of memories of her, but I tried to remember the small things, the days we went to the shops and we bought an ice-cream, the days we were just sitting there on the couch and she was reading me a book. Those small little memories kept me alive.

There is just one memory that keeps haunting me, over and over again. It were my mother and me going to the zoo together. It must have been a special day – clowns were all walking around the place, and there were dancers and people dressed up like animals. 

I was never scared of these creatures, never was, but this time...yeah, I don't know how to explain, this time it was different for me. I was playing on the swings, just enjoying myself – my mum was getting a coffee at that time – when a clown walked towards me. I wasn't afraid of clowns, but this one looked really strange. I couldn't remember quite a lot about him, I was young of course. I could only remember that he looked odd.

"Your father is not the man that he seems to be," the clown said, his voice was deep and sinister. He handed me a package, telling me not to open it until I was 13 years old. I nodded my head, and I kept to that promise. I hadn't opened it until my 13th birthday.

~~~ 

Hearing my footsteps echoing on the cold floor of the alley, I made my way through the darkness. My hands were bloody and my heart was beating faster and faster. Someone had seen me. It was a girl, I couldn't see her, but she could see my face. This was the end. This was the damned end. I could hear some people whispering in the dark alley, they were saying something like: "Gylfie, come back. Don't go there! Soren will kill you!"

I started to run, it was more of a reflex, I had to get away here, before they could get me. I had just killed a young woman again. An unclean woman. I walked home slowly, hiding the knife I had used. When I finally arrived home I went to the kitchen to clean my hands. In the artificial light I could clearly see the redness on my hands. I sighed and I dried my hands. I went to sit down on one of the kitchen chairs moving my hands up my head, thinking about what I had done. It was horrible. It was truly horrible. I didn't want to think about it. Someone had seen me, my life was over. They would go to the police and they will find me, arrest me. And then I would spend my entire life in jail.

I slowly sauntered upstairs and I got undressed, when I felt around my neck I missed something. Something that was always there, but today it was not. My necklace?! Where was it? I looked for it in my room, in my pants, even in my underwear, but it was no where to be found around my body. It was in the kitchen, in the living room and everywhere I had been. Did I perhaps leave it at the crime?

Not thinking about it, I went to bed and I slowly, but with difficulty fell into a deep sleep, with dreams and nightmares. 

The night was young when I shot up, wide awake. I had been sleeping for a couple of hours, but I just couldn't get the voice of the girl out of my head. She was haunting my thoughts and my mind. I decided to get out of bed and to grab a glass of ice-cold water. I sauntered to the bathroom and I yawned. I opened the door and I switched the light on. It was a light place and there was a white bath and a white toilet. I had all installed it myself. It took a while, but then you at least had something. 

I opened the tap and let the water flow into the glass. When it was half-filled I threw it in my face. It woke me up, I didn't want to sleep, I could better stay away and think about the problems I was going to have. I could call the police right now? Or I could wait...? I didn't know what to do. I was doubting about this. I took the sink and I looked at myself in the mirror. My eyes looked tired as I rubbed away the sleep in my eyes. I couldn't sleep anyways.

~~~ 

I observed the woman stumbling in. She was young, had blonde hair and wore red lipstick. She wore a short black dress and smiled at me, while I was coloring a picture I had made for my dad. I had turned 13 last week and from that day on I actually noticed my dad bringing in women and God knows what he did after that.

Most of the times he would take them upstairs to his bedroom, sometimes he would first give them a glass of wine and they would drink together. But this time it was again going upstairs. I was lonely once again.

~~~ 

The sun broke through as the birds woke me up. I noticed myself laying on the couch. I went downstairs, watching TV, but I eventually fell asleep. It was time for me to work again. I got up and I walked to the kitchen and made myself some breakfast: a bowl of cereal and a cup of black coffee. I got ready as quick as I could and I walked towards my car and started the engine.

The streets were empty as I parked my car in front of the studio where I usually met the guys to recording our newest album. Of course there wasn't much to fear yet I was scared of doing something wrong. We had practiced every single song perhaps a million times, yet I couldn't help it to be scared and to be freaked out by the idea of making a mistake.

I sauntered up the long stairs – of course the elevator was broken, once again – as I heard some music surrounding me. Of course, the others were already upstairs, as I could recognize the solos Brian used to play. I chuckled and I stepped inside the studio and greeted my best friends.  
"What are we up to, motherfuckers?" I asked as I sat down on a chair. I saw Syn and Zacky laughing.  
"Hmm, nothing much really. Ready to rock 'n roll?" Zacky asked as he played some chords of 'Beast and the Harlot'.  
"Hell yeah!" I yelled and then I looked around and I saw we missed a member. "wait, where's Arin?"  
"He's late, never noticed, he's always late?" Brian grinned.  
"Ah well, I'm sure he'll be here in a couple of minutes, let's just play a song," Zacky said as he heard Brian play a riff and Zacky adjusted to it by played some chords. Then they heard Johnny coming in – who just went to the toilet – so they stopped.  
"And then they stopped..." Johnny said awkwardly. The guys cracked a smile and Johnny rolled his eyes. "Come on guys, let's just play the song." Arin walked in and he was breathing heavily. He probably had been running. Johnny smiled towards him and grabbed his bass-guitar and stepped inside the closed area, the others followed. We stood there as I took the microphone and put on the headphones. We had practiced this song so many times, so everyone knew what to do. We played and I sang, you know, the usual things you do in a studio. Yet, my mind went off...

~~~ 

"I guess I'll have to go. Michelle is probably already waiting for me," Brian said as I poured the last bit of the ice-cold beer in his mouth. He stood up from his stool and waved when he stood in the doorway. Then he walked out of the bar. The only ones left were me and my glass of wine.  
"Never thought we would meet again," I heard a female voice speaking. I shot around and I saw a fairly short lady standing there. She was wearing high heels and red lipstick covered her beautiful shaped lips. "I guess I have something that is yours." She extended a hand and opened it. There was my necklace I had been looking for last night. I took it and immediately put it on again.  
"Thank you, I may say," I tried to be as polite as possible. This woman looked irrevocably beautiful.  
"You're welcome. I guess you should be happy, I was there that night you committed the crime," she said as she sat down on the stool next to me. In a reflex I turned her way and I closed my mouth.  
"Err, perhaps yes. H-how did you know?" I mumbled.  
"It wasn't that hard to find you. You are easy to find. The way your shadow looked...hmm I guess there's only one shadow like that. Then I followed you around, and I ended up here," she answered and smiled. "I'd like to have a Jägermeister please." The bartender nodded and she turned to me again.  
"I guess I'll have to take that as a compliment..." I said as I sipped on my beer.  
"Maybe you should," she said, drank something and extended a hand again, "my name's Gylfie, by the way,. Gylfie Groover." I shook her hand.  
"My name is Matt Sanders,"I said and I smiled.  
"Nice to meet you," she said and looked away, "why did you kill her?" She looked at me with pleading eyes. Her blue eyes were as gorgeous as the night.  
"It's a long story..." I said. I couldn't be happy about what I had done to all those women – some of them weren't even eighteen yet.  
"I have time," she said, "I'm curious to know."  
"Hmm. I'll be here tomorrow at 5, I'll meet you there, I have to go now," I said and I stood up and walked away, leaving Gylfie behind.

~~~ 

Walking away from that girl was probably one of the most horrible things I'd done at that time. And I regretted everything. Thinking about it now, I would have turned around and kissed her on the lips. But I didn't. I walked away. 

~~~ 

The day after that, Gylfie and I talked for hours, about the most random things. We had lots in common, she was probably just the girl of my dreams. The only thing was that she was a whore. I tried avoiding the subject she wanted to talk about. She wanted to know and I tried explaining everything.  
"When I was 13 years old, I knew my dad was getting prostitutes in, just to have fun with them. In the end he would dump them back on the street and never look at them again. I was so angry when I figured I out, I wanted to kill all the prostitutes on earth, just to get my normal dad back," I said, "it are times I want to forget, but I just..." I looked down, staring at my feet, yet I wanted to look up and see her reaction. Her soft hand touched my skin and I tried not to smile that obvious. I just didn't want to. She moved her hand up to my face and stroked my face, moving up my chin. Her pleading eyes teary.  
"I wish you would kill me out of love, what perfect happiness would that be?"  
Her crystal blue eyes looked up and a spark of light was shown, not afraid to die. As if she was certain to get killed by me. She'd killed me several times with her eyes, they were destructible to me.  
"I-I can't," I answered. Her eyes were surprised, but stood happy. She moved forward and her red lips touched mine. I relaxed and tried not to think about it too much that these lips touched thousand others.

~~~ 

That night I went home with a happy feeling in my stomach. I went home together with Gylfie, I wouldn't want anything, not yet. We just sat on the couch, drank a few bottles of wine together, got damn drunk and passed out on the floor. I guess that's what I life is like.

~~~ 

The morning after, I woke up with a horrible headache. Of course I could have expected that coming, however, I didn't think about that the last night. I looked around me on the floor, but Gylfie was gone. She disappeared into the night again. I sighed and tried standing up. I should've taken care of her, she couldn't just go back to that place. That man will kill her! I sat down on the couch, didn't want to stand up to get myself a coffee. I had to find Gylfie back. 

I felt myself getting closer to Gylfie every minute, every second of the day. She was one of the only people I would find myself getting married to. She was an unclean woman, I actually had to kill her. I have to. It's my fate to. I was doubting about what to do. I loved her, however she wasn't worth living. On the other hand, she was forced to be there, but why didn't she escape...?

There were moments I thought about her quite often, thinking about seeing her again. But there were also moments that I would wonder why I had done something that stupid. Kissing an unclean woman. I sinned. It had been a week since I saw Gylfie, I had been looking for her. All day, sometimes even at night. But I never found her back. It was a strange feeling to do something like that for a girl. 

This night, I sauntered around the streets, just to pick up one glimpse of her. Hours passed as I sat on the pavement, waiting for women to come out. I saw several of them, some of them even tried to seduce me, with no success. After a few more hours of waiting, I decided to go home again and I walked on the pavement looking at all the trees surrounding me. Sometimes a couple, who've just been out passed me. I was jealous of their happiness. I sighed and started walking a little bit faster. 

~~~ 

It was the moment I had been waiting for. Opening that present I got from that creepy clown. The box was unopened and the paper had started to rotten a little, because it was so old, but I was certain what was inside it, would've have vanished by now. 

I ripped the carton apart and I opened the little box inside the other box. It was stupid to put several boxes in each other, yet I thought it was slightly funny. As I opened the smaller box, my eyes opened in amazement. I grabbed hold of the present and observed it. It was a knife...

~~~ 

"Matt!" I heard behind me. It was impossible that there was someone who knew me was in this small little alley. However, I instantly turned around and looking at the shadow behind me. I gazed at it, and then I realized it was the girl I had been looking for.  
"G-Gylfie...?" I mumbled, "is it really you?" The shadow nodded and stepped closer. I looked at her face and I saw that her eyes were blue and her face was scarred. "What happened?" She didn't reply and her hands were bloody as she showed them to me. In the one hand was a knife, she had been cutting herself.  
"Why Gyl, why?" I stepped closer, but then she took a gun and pointed it on me. I was surprised. I was the one killing people here. Not her.  
"O-one st-step clos-s-ser and I'm going to fire," Gylfie stuttered. She wasn't going to do that, was she?  
"Gylfie, don't," I said, "I've never loved anyone like this before." I wanted to hug and kiss her, but I couldn't. Maybe she was going to fire the gun and then I was never going to see her again.  
"You're lying! You liar!" she yelled. This was the final thing. I stepped forward and she pulled the trigger. I closed my eyes and I heard a scream escaping her mouth. This was my last moment on earth. I had to cherish it. Think about the things I had done wrong. Was I going to Heaven? Hell? Was there even anything up there? Perhaps there wasn't even a heaven, nor a hell. After a few minutes of thinking – at least it seemed like a few minutes – I decided to open my eyes again and I saw her laying on the floor.  
"GYLFIE!" I screamed, tears crashing around me. She didn't aim at me, she aimed at herself. I didn't want to touch her. I didn't know how. My eyes were teary and my hands were bloody. What did I do? I caressed her face and moved the hair aside. I took her in my arms and I walked home. 

~~~ 

How horrible it is to love something that death can touch?


End file.
